Hip Hop is Doing The Unthinkable...Making Me Feel Old

I went to see M1 from dead Prez at the El Mocombo on Wednesday night (hot!) and the entire time leading up to it I was pumped. I had just bought a cute new hat, my makeup was on point, I had on the appropriate gear for a grimy hip hop jam (note to the ladies: no heels and no skirts!) and was confident in my lyric retention that I'd be raisin' my fist and screaming along at all the right times. I didn't listen to any of his ish because from long time me and my former concert buddy Anselm agreed that if you listen to an artist work just prior to a concert you're setting yourself up for disappointment. We had a few pints pre-concert, and then a few prairie fires (tequila and Tabasco to you neophyte drinkers) and I was hyped.

First of all we get to the club and wait outside for the weedman in the dreary chilly rainy night, when this "homeless" woman comes up and bums my friend for a cigarette. She shuts her down so the woman looks at me and I tell her I got none. This is where the story should end but this bitch looks me up and down and says, "so what, you're just gonna stand here all night".

To which I say, "mind you bidness what we're doin her and keep it movin'!"

All of sudden she starts shoutin' at the top of her lungs about how I can't tell her nothin', and being the now liquored up (loudmouth that I am - well regardless of liquor really but I'll gladly use it as a crutch in this instance) I began shouting even louder right into her open mouth. It only lasted about 30 seconds but all of Spadina was shocked and starin' including Carlene Nation, a reporter for CTV news who was just beginning to do a story outside the ElMo (yes there was a camera crew). I don't business.
The woman finally steps off and my two companions are trying to tell me to calm down but the thing is, I was calm. I thought it was fuckin' funny as hell, but I was calm. See I can yell at a bitch and still be cool. In fact it really hyped me up for the concert.

Yeah I'm swearing a lot but hip hop dose that to me - please excuse.

Weedman arrived and we entered the club with little fanfare except the bouncer did scrutinize my friend Malinda's i.d. a little too long. And not in a how U doin', kinda vibe either. This made me laugh harder cause I cus out a bum in front of the place and sail in but she got the gasface!

Have a beer, like I needed another and survey the crowd. There's only like 60 people in the joint and between me and my 3 friends we know 50% of them. My head begins noddin' I'm kinda swayin' to the beat, Malinda's dancin' like she's at a rave beside me, and suddenly I scan the crowd. Everyone around our area was like 19. Young! It was a 19+ event and most of them just made it. For a good 30 minutes I got depressed and questioned whether I was gettin' to old to be going to grimy smokey clubs to catch a show on a weekday. i think I stood stock still just runnin' it over in my mind. But then I had another beer and forgot what I had been depressed about. Later this made me more depressed. Am I so old I'm forgetting shit so easily? Early onset Alzheimer's maybe? Didn't really get any young'uns numbers either. Depression level 3. LOL

But then after the show at coat check this brother was goin' off cuz he lost his ticket and the White girl wouldn't give 'em his coat (that he could see clearly from the doorway). When I say go -off I mean money can dashed off the table, then table flipped over, and lots of "bitch you think I care about your Security? I want my fuckin' jacket!"
That's when I realized I love hip hop and that angry hyped up, adrenaline rush is universal no matter what age. I 'll never be too old! F-That!
Of course the Becky was yellin' back tryin' a act hard telling dude that she doesn't need Security cuz she'll deal with him herself. Some Asian girl tried to intervene but we told her to shut up and keep it movin' lest she wanna be a casualty cause she wanted to help some nameless, faceless, Black guy who's so angry right now even he could rationalize punchin' her for jumpin' up in his bidness.
Which is when the rest of us in the cramped hallway grabbed our coats and said "hell's a poppin" and ran laughing down the stairs not even to botherin' to look back to see if either girl got their asses kicked. Punk's jump up to get beat down. Hip Hop lives!